Thursday, August 20, 2009

hm, what do you do when

your family is falling apart?
well maybe its only for a day,
or a week.
or maybe the rest of your life.
slowly it could get better and regain its morals again.
but i dont know.
all i know is that today my family seems split into three pieces,
and me being a neutral piece.
is that neutral piece supposed to help each other piece until they all find there way back together?
not exactly.
doing that could cause lies, and more pain if its truthful.
either way,
someone will get hurt more than they are.
each piece has an idea with some right tweaks in it.
but then theres those tweaks that dont make sense and are selfish.
to bring down each piece more seems wrong,
but i suppose if you were to do so,
we would all be at our lowest moments,
find hope by finding others in their lowest moments.
is this making sense?
run away?
its an escape,
i understand.
is it always the answer?
it will always come back,
so while your running and hiding,
realize that your coming back to it,
and it could blow up all over again.
im sure the fact of $$ being so little doesnt help at all
probably adds to everyones anger,
which theyre lashing out on each other.
life seems strange right now,
because while everything isnt going right,
ive got a sense of peace in my mind, and my heart.
that peace where i feel like everything will go fine,
everything will get fixed,
all by the precious grace of God.

Monday, August 3, 2009


blogging like i said i would.

honestly though!?
youre an @$$hole!
you know it!
wtf would you say something like that?
i dont understand it.
right as i started to get better,
and be happy again and take a nice giant step from those tears,
you brought it back.
i mean oh my gosh
youre not who i thought you were.
id love it if you officially say it.
like for real.
youve made me hate you.
not really,
i loathe you?
i dont know.
i dont know how you could do this,
or say this.
i mean for real.
youve just shoved anger & depression down my throat with such great strength,
that its broken me.
probably not.
because you dont care./
do you?
not anymore at least.
removing me from your life was supposed to make this situation better?
i cant handle this.
man up.

ps, i hate this bolog,
its not deep.
jusst honest feelings -__-